Wife continually interrupts husband in conversation
ASKING ERIC
R. ERIC THOMAS
Dear Eric: I have been married to a wonderful woman for many years. She is educated and has many years of practical experience. But if there is anything that makes me "bite the bullet," it's her interruptions mid-delivery from me. I have dared to call her out for interrupting me and she will say I'm taking too long to make a point, even in a short first sentence (because she knows what I am going to say anyway).
I am also educated (engineering) with many years of hands-on and practical experience.
My conversational practice is different. I wait things out, actively listening, and by the time the person is done, I've dismissed what I was going to say lest I have to go back to an earlier point where that person took the conversation and it has changed context.
I don't interrupt. I will raise a finger. Often, she won't stop, and I have no desire to rewind the conversation. So, what say you about communication practices in such an environment? Yup, I'm too passive. But I don't want an argument about an argument that ignores the original issue. — Uninterrupted
Dear Uninterrupted: No one person gets to define the rules of a conversation. So even if she's thinking ahead or, heaven forfend, getting a little bored, that conversation needs to be a two way exchange you're building together.
I understand the difficulty of your situation: Talking about how hard it is to talk to each other can be more frustrating than productive.
Try picking one subject or time to test out a new dynamic. Say, dinner, for instance. You can tell her, "I'd like to tell you a story. You might get ahead of me, but it would be really great if you'd let me get my full thought out. Could you listen?" Setting the expectation up front may help her to shift her thinking. This isn't you "talking badly"; this is an opportunity for connection, and she can modify her behavior and response.
There are a number of conversational prompt card games that couples find helpful, and they might be a good testing area for shifting the dynamic, as well. I particularly like Esther Perel's card game "Where Should We Begin?" Choose a night, pick a card, and commit to each other that you're going to listen fully before responding as part of the game.
Dear Eric: My mother and I have owned a home together for the last 20 years following my divorce.
When we purchased the home, it was understood that it was only an investment for me.
I have now met a wonderful man, and we would like to start our lives together. My mother, though, would like us all to live together in the home she and I share.
We don't want that. My mother would be able to buy a smaller home with her half of the profit, were we to sell our current home.
My mother, however, does not want to move or sell. She loves the house and is very proud of it. I have explained that I would like to move forward with my boyfriend, so that he and I can start our life together.
She wonders why we cannot do that while living together. I have explained over and over again that this is not what he and I want.
She says she will leave when I "throw her out," which is not at all what I would do. I would like her to want us to be happy, and to be amenable to moving to a smaller home or even an apartment. Can you help us? — Trapped
Dear Trapped: Even though the home was an investment for you, after 20 years, it makes sense that your mother has started to feel that it's home. Your lives are moving at different speeds, and you have different needs right now. It sounds like she's trying to come up with a compromise that keeps her from experiencing even more disruption. Because, it should be pointed out, when you move out, that's going to change a lot of things for her.
Is there a way that her desire to stay in her home and your desire to move to the next stage in your relationship with your boyfriend aren't in opposition? For instance, can she buy you out of your half of the house, either in full or gradually over time? If you want to move in with your boyfriend, but most of your cash is tied up in the house, is renting together for a year a possibility?
You write that you want her to be happy. Part of that entails acknowledging that while she's not part of the decision-making process for you and your boyfriend, she has her own life, and home, and relationship with you.
Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com.
TODAY IN HISTORY
On this date
In 1914, the Panama Canal officially opened as the SS Ancon crossed the just-completed waterway between the Pacific and Atlantic oceans.
In 1935, humorist Will Rogers and aviator Wiley Post were killed when their airplane crashed near Point Barrow in the Alaska Territory.
In 1947, India gained independence after nearly 200 years of British rule.
In 1961, as workers began constructing a Berlin Wall made of concrete, East German soldier Conrad Schumann leapt to freedom over a tangle of barbed wire.
In 1969, the Woodstock Music and Art Fair opened in upstate New York; more than 460,000 people attended the three-day festival, which would become a watershed event in American music and culture.
In 1989, F.W. de Klerk was sworn in as acting president of South Africa, one day after P.W. Botha resigned because of a power struggle within the National Party.
In 1998, 29 people were killed by a car bomb that tore apart the center of Omagh, Northern Ireland; a splinter group calling itself the Real IRA claimed responsibility.
In 2003, bouncing back from the largest blackout in U.S. history, cities from the Midwest to Manhattan restored power to tens of millions of people.
ROYAL STARS
Happy Birthday for Friday, Aug. 15, 2025:
This year, exciting changes bring you increased personal freedom. Stay flexible. Let go of things that might have been impeding your progress and growth. Seek out new opportunities and be ready to act fast.
The stars show the kind of day you’ll have: 5-Dynamic; 4-Positive; 3-Average; 2-So-so; 1-Difficult
ARIES (March 21-April 19)
★★★★ Financial opportunities abound today; therefore, look for ways to boost your income. You might make money through real estate negotiations. Tonight: Check your belongings.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20)
★★★★★ This is an amazing day! The moon is in your sign dancing with fair Venus and lucky, moneybags Jupiter. Go after what you want, because you have the Midas touch. Tonight: Relax.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20)
★★★★ This is a feel-good day, which is why you can kick back and relax. Life has been busy, and the pace has been fast. Tonight: Enjoy privacy.
CANCER (June 21-July 22)
★★★★★ You’re popular today. Spend the day with a friend or a group. People are happy and upbeat. Tonight: Schmooze.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)
★★★★ You’re high-viz today, which is a good thing, because you make an excellent impression on everyone. You look charming, attractive and affluent (even if you aren’t). Tonight: Be cool.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)
★★★★★ Travel plans look appealing! If you can’t travel, then take a day trip. If you can’t do that, then do something different today. Tonight: Learn or study.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)
★★★★★ Financial negotiations will go well today, especially if you’re discussing details with bosses or authority figures. This is an excellent day to decide how to share something, like an inheritance. Tonight: Check paperwork.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
★★★★★ A discussion with a partner or close friend might result in an exciting plan for some future travel. Or perhaps these plans are about higher education or exploring opportunities in publishing, the media, medicine or the law. Tonight: Listen carefully.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
★★★★ This is an excellent day to ask for an increased budget, equipment, materials or help from others — perhaps even money. Certainly, practical considerations will favoryou. Tonight: Work.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
★★★★★ Enjoy schmoozing with others today. This is a fun-loving, playful day! Live it up! Tonight: Play!
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
★★★★ This is a feel-good day for family and home. You might want to relax at home by yourself. Tonight: Rest.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)
★★★★★ This is a fantastic day to schmooze and have fun with others. However, it’s also a wonderful day for writers and creative people, because you’re in touch with your talents and enthusiasm. Tonight: Get involved.
— King Features Syndicate
INDOOR ACCIDENTS
MY PET WORLD
Sometimes we make accommodations that help senior pets age gracefully, writes Cathy M. Rosenthal.
Dear Cathy: I enjoy your column each week, but I have never seen my problem mentioned. We have a 16-year-old Schnauzer/Yorkie rescue boy. He is a wonderful dog, but he is getting very old.
A couple of years ago, we started using doggie diapers in the house because he was beginning to experience incontinence. That has helped tremendously. Now we have a new issue. We walk him regularly, but often he doesn't poop or poops only a small amount. When he's home, he then poops on the floor. I think he has trouble maintaining his "pooping stance" outside, and he feels more secure inside. Is there anything I can do?
— Harriette, Boca Raton, Florida
Dear Harriette: You are very observant, as dogs are most vulnerable when they are in that position. So, yes, he probably feels incredibly vulnerable and nervous about pooping outside. At 16, your little guy might also be dealing with joint discomfort, reduced muscle tone and even slight cognitive decline, all of which can make the process of pooping outside more difficult or confusing.
Here are a few things you can try to help him:
1 Talk to your veterinarian
Make sure there's no underlying medical condition causing him discomfort when he tries to poop. Arthritis, spinal issues and gastrointestinal discomfort can make pooping physically difficult or painful, especially when trying to balance in that classic squat.
2 Adjust his routine
Try walking him during warmer parts of the day when his muscles are less stiff , or shorten the walks and bring him to a familiar grassy or quiet spot, and wait. Some older dogs need more time to feel comfortable enough to go.
3 Create an indoor potty station
If he really feels safest inside, you can try setting up an indoor potty area with pee pads or a washable turf patch in a corner of your home. You might even transition him to pooping there regularly, so it's not on the floor. It's not ideal, but with senior pets, sometimes we make accommodations that help them age gracefully.
4 Reward him immediately
If he does poop outside, give him lots of praise and a treat right away. Reinforcing the behavior may encourage him to go outdoors again.
You've done such a good job managing his incontinence with diapers, and your continued care and patience show how much he is loved. With a few small adjustments, you may be able to reduce the accidents and help him feel more secure, whether he's inside or out.
Cathy M. Rosenthal is a longtime animal advocate, author, columnist and pet expert who has more than 25 years in the animal welfare field. Send your pet questions, stories and tips to cathy@petpundit.com. Please include your name, city and state. You can follow her @cathymrosenthal.
Trying to find copies of old yearbooks
HINTS FROM HELOISE
HELOISE
Dear Heloise: Just a suggestion: Instead of turning away unwanted yearbooks, they could possibly be stored for someone like me who has lost two years of my yearbooks.
There could be a list of people who are looking for a certain yearbook, and they could register on it what it is that they need. Then when someone comes in with a yearbook donation, this list could be checked to see if someone was looking for this year and notify them that it is available. — Betty B., in Champion, Ohio
Betty, this is a great idea. Sometimes yearbooks get lost, but people want the memories they contain. You might try contacting to see if they get requests from people for yearbooks. If not, maybe they would be interested in starting something like this for their members. — Heloise
Sanitizing hint
Dear Heloise: I have been painting for a week now, but back on day one when I was cleaning up, I reached for the hand soap pump and hit the hand sanitizer pump instead. So, I washed my painty hands with it, and it amazingly and quickly removed all the paint from my hands. No using a scrub brush or hard rubbing — just regular washing. Then, I tried it on a few spots on the floor, and it worked just as well. Since then, I have used it every day when I clean up.
Like with all good discoveries, the results of one person needs to be duplicated. I urge your readers who are currently painting to try it and report back. This might be another use for hand sanitizer. — Margaret, in Buena Park, California Margaret, this is a great hint! When I paint something, I usually wear a pair of latex gloves. This way, I won't have any paint in the areas between my nails and the skin next to my nails. — Heloise
A reader's favorite hints
Dear Heloise: I'm not sure where I saw this tip, but it is one of my favorites: If you are traveling with your own pillow, be sure to use a colorful pillowcase. It stands out from hotel or Airbnb bedding, and you won't leave it behind.
Another favorite is saving butter wrappers in the fridge to grease baking dishes. — Betsy H., via email
Betsy, I think I know where you got the idea for butter wrappers. It was one of my mother's favorite hints. She loved recycling things and hated waste. Thank you for remembering this handy and useful idea! — Heloise
Reusing plastic bags
Dear Heloise: I regularly use large tortillas to make wrap sandwiches. The brand I get comes in a resealable zip-close bag. When the bag is empty, I turn it inside out, brush off the crumbs, and let it stay inside out to make sure that any moisture has dried. Then I turn it back to normal and store it with other storage products. I use them for shaking/coating foods before frying or baking. I also place chicken in them when making chicken cutlets or when crushing nuts. The bags work great, and reusing them cuts down on plastic use and the cost of zip-close bags. — Melody S., via email
Melody, I always love a great recycling hint, and yours is a very good one! I no longer use plastic grocery bags; I ask for paper bags and fill them with items that need to be recycled. Then I toss the paper bag in the recycle bin. — Heloise
